Emotions impact your money decisions

7/20/2016


As women we may be controlling the household finances, making 80% of all consumer purchases and paying more than 60% of the household bills, but may of us have a love/hate relationship with money.

Yet, so many of us are conflicted in our feelings about money. Why? Because we deal with money in emotional ways.

Some of us are infatuated with money and we allow it rule to rule our lives. Others spend as a way to make themselves feel better. And some are so afraid of not having money that they hoard it and have a difficult time spending it and enjoying it.

If any of these ideas strike a chord, then it means that you have a dysfunctional relationship with money.

It’s hard to build financial wealth when, deep-down inside, you view money as a problem.

However, money isn't the problem. Your own fears and assumptions about money.

If you are sabotaging yourself around money anywhere in your life, most likely there is a message, story or belief system behind it.

The beliefs we have about money today stems from our childhood, which is when we developed our “money scripts”. These beliefs about money, drive our financial behaviours day in out. And usually, we’re not even aware of them.

When our parents were fighting about money, we learned as children that money is a source of conflict. If our parents were worried over paying bills and always talking about never having enough money, we learned to have fears that will never be enough money.


As you can see from the examples above, you may have learned from early experience the value of self-denial and self-deprivation in money matters. Or maybe money was always taboo in your home.  Or you received messages that you should feel guilty about money and that money was unstable and scary.

Recognising this messages is the first step in stripping them of their power, and overcoming our money disorders.

Psychologists also believe that our relationship with money is embedded in our larger sense of self. As women, we tend to measure our worth based on the richness of our relationships – not our bank account. For instance, when you go to the mall and end up buying items you don’t need, you might be feeling lonely. Realising this can lead them to fulfilling their needs in healthier ways (and saving some cash).

This is the truth: money is a tool. It gets things done. It buys groceries and it pays the bills.

But as I've learned, money can also serve as an important gateway to a deeper understanding of ourselves. Taking some time to look at your relationship with money not only will help you financially, it will help you to achieve your goals— whatever they may be.

As a woman, you can learn more about yourself by paying closer attention to your money spending habits around money. Once you start exploring those buried beliefs and those unhealthy behaviour towards money, you can deal with it in a logical, rational way. And if you need some help to dig deeper, don’t hesitate to seek out books or an expert.

While knowing the mechanics of investing and financial management is important, I believe it's essential that women also understand and address the emotional issues related to money if they are to avoid living with continual worry and guilt.

By understanding and proactively addressing the emotional issues surrounding money, we can ultimately lead more satisfying and rewarding lives.

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